So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Randomize
