that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Randomize
