Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Randomize
