Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
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