actually, I'm a sock model
I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Randomize
