That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
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