i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Randomize
