My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
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