Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
Randomize