Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
Randomize
