i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
Randomize
