I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
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