White coat. Heels.
i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Randomize
