Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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