Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize