So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
you guys were way drunker than both of me
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
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