We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
Randomize
