he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
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