just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Randomize
