just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
Randomize