Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
Randomize
