Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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