Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
Everyone says I win the strip club
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
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