He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
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