margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
