so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
what day is it and did you see me today?
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
Randomize
