Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize
