Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
