things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
im holly from the hills drunk
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
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