Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize