Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Randomize
