spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
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