My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
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