so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
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