Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
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