Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Randomize
