How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
