508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Holy shit dude........stairs
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
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