So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Randomize