I'm so fucking centered right now
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Randomize
