did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
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