i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Randomize
