Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
