i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
