Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
Randomize
