I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
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