I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Randomize
