Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
Just took my morning after pill in the library
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
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