i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
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