I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
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