I never want to see another naked old woman again.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
